East End/EaDo Real Estate

[kylejack]

How about a shotgun with a mounted bayonet?

[Highway6]

How bout a personal flamethrower?

[AtticaFlinch]

How about a shotgun with a mounted bayonet?

I have a buddy who built one of those. He put a laser sight on it to quicken his reaction time too. He called it his zombie gun, but it would have worked beautifully on house burglars as well.

Edit: It also had a pistol grip and a folding stock. This gun was 360 degrees of awesome.

Edited January 11, 2010 by AtticaFlinch

[RedScare]

Clearly, you people all have maids...and free lawyers.

[AtticaFlinch]

Clearly, you people all have maids...and free lawyers.

Who needs a lawyer when we've got free legal advice on HAIF?

[TheNiche]

How bout a personal flamethrower?

My grandfather was initially trained to operate a flamethrower, but the fumes made him vomit uncontrollably so they reassigned him. But...he did learn all about the guts of the flamethrower, and as a machinist after the war he did repair one that was owned by someone out in Bastrop County. They are legal to own and operate, btw, and even to build and sell if you have the know-how. Not very practical for home defense, though.

I can only imagine that this is the scene on that guy's ranch every New Year's Eve:

How about a shotgun with a mounted bayonet?

Yeah, that's what I meant by my earlier remark.

[RedScare]

Who needs a lawyer when we've got free legal advice on HAIF?

I know it is fun to fantasize about blowing burglars and other thuggage into the next life, but EVERY shooting goes before the Grand Jury. Taking one's chances by going in alone runs the risk of the jury misunderstanding one's intentions and returning a murder indictment. While an attorney for a Grand Jury appearance can run several thousand dollars, defending a murder indictment can cost tens of thousands.

Now, as for the method of ridding the world of your favorite thug, I've seen a few crime scenes in my day. Few of them were neat or orderly. If you are lucky, you shoot him with less than Dirty Harry's dogleg, and the bullet does not leave the body. Fewer holes means less blood. Also, hopefully he bleeds on linoleum, or some other surface that does not absorb the blood. Otherwise, the blood soaks into the surface and you are stuck with it for awhile. If you're one of those cowboys that fancies blowing the guy to smithereens, you'll have smithereens all over your carpet, walls and furniture. Good luck cleaning that up. And, heaven forbid you aim for the head. Brain matter splattered on walls can make even a seasoned detective puke. Oh, and if you miss, repairing all of your walls and belongings can be expensive. Oh, and did I mention that, your home now being a crime scene, you can expect a dozen or so cops to be stomping through for up to 2 days afterward? Oh, and don't forget the exhaustive interviews about what happened. And, no, you don't just get to tell the story once.

This is why I prefer to simply make my home less attractive to burglars. While talking tough on internet forums and Chronicle comment sections can make one feel really tough to a bunch of strangers, I promise you none of us will want to come watch the Super Bowl at your house until you have tidied things up a bit. And, let's face it, no one sounds tough discussing what solution of bleach best cleans blood stains or what brand of rubber gloves is best to keep body fluids off you. And, who the hell wants to chill in your crib, knowing a guy died there?

Sorry for the reality check. Now, back to the tough guy talk.

[kylejack]

Texas grand juries are pretty friendly to armed homeowners. Perhaps a little too friendly if the case of Joe Horn is any indication.

[Highway6]

Seems KyleJack has the solution to RedScare's messy reality check.... Chase them outside. Then blow them away.

[TheNiche]

Sorry for the reality check. Now, back to the tough guy talk.

This is why I changed my load to buckshot. Dead men cannot be called as a witness. But I agree, making your home unattractive to burglars is Step One.

Seems KyleJack has the solution to RedScare's messy reality check.... Chase them outside. Then blow them away.

Note that that strategy only works if they are actually taking something of yours with them. If they hadn't burgled yet and were only trespassing at the point that you chased them out of your home, then shooting them creates a legal mess for you.

[kylejack]

Note that that strategy only works if they are actually taking something of yours with them.

Or something of a neighbor's who you have never met.

[AtticaFlinch]

This is why I changed my load to buckshot. Dead men cannot be called as a witness. But I agree, making your home unattractive to burglars is Step One.

That's why the first thing I did when I moved into my current home was put a rusty engine block and a couple Kroger's shopping carts on the lawn.

[kylejack]

and a couple Kroger's shopping carts

You monster.

[TheNiche]

That's why the first thing I did when I moved into my current home was put a rusty engine block and a couple Kroger's shopping carts on the lawn.

It isn't enough to have an engine block in your yard if it isn't hanging from a branch of a tree by a chain or salvaged fraying dock lines. Only that level of mechanical ingenuity is sufficient to convey your redneck bona fides. At that point, a prospective burglar not only satisfied with your lack of nice things but that you will be passionate with your decision to shoot, steady with your aim, and proud of the consequences that may come.

[rbarz]

It isn't enough to have an engine block in your yard if it isn't hanging from a branch of a tree by a chain or salvaged fraying dock lines. Only that level of mechanical ingenuity is sufficient to convey your redneck bona fides. At that point, a prospective burglar not only satisfied with your lack of nice things but that you will be passionate with your decision to shoot, steady with your aim, and proud of the consequences that may come.

You guys have it all wrong. You need to put a weight set on the front lawn... prison style.

[samagon]

I'm assembling my list, let me know if I miss something:

1. flamethrower

2. shotgun with bayonette

3. old engine possibly hanging from tree (I'll have to wait a few years as my red oak was planted only a year and a half ago).

4. weight set

5. lawyer on retainer

6. industrial cleaning supplies

7. Samuel L. Jackson's number so he can be on brain detail

For the engine block, what is recommended? I'm sure any foreign manufacturer is out of the picture, and generally any 4 cylinder engine should be a no go, but what are the advantages and disadvantages to 6 vs 8 cylinder, and then if I go 6, inline or V? I think if I could get an old ford or dodge straight 6 that this would be the best.

I'm not certain about the weight set, if someone doesn't recognize the danger that is posed by a weight set in the front yard, couldn't they use one of the weights to wreck havoc?

And should I go out and get some old appliances as well (washers, dryers, cars) and put those in the front yard too?

[sarahiki]

I'm assembling my list, let me know if I miss something:

1. flamethrower

2. shotgun with bayonette

3. old engine possibly hanging from tree (I'll have to wait a few years as my red oak was planted only a year and a half ago).

4. weight set

5. lawyer on retainer

6. industrial cleaning supplies

7. Samuel L. Jackson's number so he can be on brain detail

For the engine block, what is recommended? I'm sure any foreign manufacturer is out of the picture, and generally any 4 cylinder engine should be a no go, but what are the advantages and disadvantages to 6 vs 8 cylinder, and then if I go 6, inline or V? I think if I could get an old ford or dodge straight 6 that this would be the best.

I'm not certain about the weight set, if someone doesn't recognize the danger that is posed by a weight set in the front yard, couldn't they use one of the weights to wreck havoc?

And should I go out and get some old appliances as well (washers, dryers, cars) and put those in the front yard too?

Might be simpler to get a deadbolt and good insurance...

[kylejack]

Might be simpler to get a deadbolt and good insurance...

Hm, neither of those would have stopped the incursion in the OP.

[sevfiv]

What amount of burglaries/forcible entries end up with inhabitants being attacked or injured?

I mean while the thought of blasting someone's body parts all over the place because they're trying to take my television is thoroughly exciting (), I couldn't handle the mess. But hell, even that could happen if they slash themselves on a broken window. I could see if you felt *you* were going to be splattered all over your living room shooting/stabbing/bludgeoning may be an option, but otherwise is it really worth it?

[kylejack]

I think its important to leave some lights on especially when you're home to discourage invasions. If someone still breaks in, they likely mean you physical harm.

[Highway6]

I'm assembling my list, let me know if I miss something:

1. flamethrower

1. Personal flamethower

You want Yoga Fire... not Yoga Flame.

Don't go all crazy on us and burn your place down.

Edited January 12, 2010 by Highway6

[TheNiche]

What amount of burglaries/forcible entries end up with inhabitants being attacked or injured?

I mean while the thought of blasting someone's body parts all over the place because they're trying to take my television is thoroughly exciting (), I couldn't handle the mess. But hell, even that could happen if they slash themselves on a broken window. I could see if you felt *you* were going to be splattered all over your living room shooting/stabbing/bludgeoning may be an option, but otherwise is it really worth it?

Then load less-than-lethal ammunition. You might try this beanbag round because not only will it indicate to law enforcement that you were trying to be respectful of the concept of sanctity of life, but because it imprints a dye marker on the suspect so that if they're arrested, the police have strong evidence tying them to the crime scene.

That's the great thing about a shotgun is its situational versatility.

[sevfiv]

^Ooh...not a bad idea!

[ricco67]

Then load less-than-lethal ammunition. You might try this beanbag round because not only will it indicate to law enforcement that you were trying to be respectful of the concept of sanctity of life, but because it imprints a dye marker on the suspect so that if they're arrested, the police have strong evidence tying them to the crime scene.

That's the great thing about a shotgun is its situational versatility.

That's quite true, but why not simply load it with birdshot since it does the same thing?

It leaves a deep enough of an imprint on the suspect that it leaves a trail of blood for law enforcement to prove they were in their house.

Not to mention if he's not caught and survives, he will remember not to hit THAT house again.

Otherwise, a beanbag will just leave a bruise and remember that might be the worse he will face....if he comes back.

[kylejack]

Because birdshot wrecks your house whereas beanbag only wrecks what it hits.

[ricco67]

I agree, and can appreciate that, but it isn't that much of a deterrent he if decides to pull something out something with a bit more kick.

Adrenalin does interesting things to a human body and he may not even feel it.

[kylejack]

Have you ever seen someone shot with a bean bag? Its pretty heavy stuff.

http://www.youtube.c...h?v=rYs6tU9xdg8

[samagon]

In all seriousness, I am certainly not prepared to take the life of someone unless I am absolutely certain my life, or the life of a loved one is in danger. My belongings aren't worth having to look someones family (no matter how much they may have deserved it) in the eye after taking a life.

When guns are in the equation, you step it up a notch, and you absolutely have to be 100% sure you can and will use it if you pull it.

I would have to train my fiance (and likely go to the range for some refreshers myself) in the appropriate use, and then trust that she will be able to think under the high pressures of that kind of situation, and that she will be able to use it if necessary.

The beanbag shotgun sounds like a good idea, but then I have to either have multiple shotguns, or carry it around the house with me at all times to feel safe.

Eventually, when we have children, that will bring a whole new element to the arsenal stashed around the house.

A beanbag doesn't do a heck of a lot of good if the guy entering your house has a gun too, and is able to overcome the beanbag to the face and nuts due to the adrenalin rush.

For me personally, I see any gun as a last option and would rather consider other options that deter them from entering the house in the first place, such as leaving bear traps scattered through my backyard, or electrifying my window frames. Or the more pedestrian approach of an alarm system, or fence, maybe even a video surveillance that records when motion is detected.

Edited January 12, 2010 by samagon

[TheNiche]

I agree, and can appreciate that, but it isn't that much of a deterrent he if decides to pull something out something with a bit more kick.

Adrenalin does interesting things to a human body and he may not even feel it.

If it were me, and I were using less-than-lethal ammo, I'd still probably have #1 buckshot loads as the last couple of rounds in the magazine. And an affixed bayonet. Just in case.

[ricco67]

In all seriousness, I am certainly not prepared to take the life of someone unless I am absolutely certain my life, or the life of a loved one is in danger. My belongings aren't worth having to look someones family (no matter how much they may have deserved it) in the eye after taking a life.

When guns are in the equation, you step it up a notch, and you absolutely have to be 100% sure you can and will use it if you pull it.

I would have to train my fiance (and likely go to the range for some refreshers myself) in the appropriate use, and then trust that she will be able to think under the high pressures of that kind of situation, and that she will be able to use it if necessary.

The beanbag shotgun sounds like a good idea, but then I have to either have multiple shotguns, or carry it around the house with me at all times to feel safe.

Eventually, when we have children, that will bring a whole new element to the arsenal stashed around the house.

A beanbag doesn't do a heck of a lot of good if the guy entering your house has a gun too, and is able to overcome the beanbag to the face and nuts due to the adrenalin rush.

For me personally, I see any gun as a last option and would rather consider other options that deter them from entering the house in the first place, such as leaving bear traps scattered through my backyard, or electrifying my window frames. Or the more pedestrian approach of an alarm system, or fence, maybe even a video surveillance that records when motion is detected.

This is one example I could find of a guy not going down. Granted, he's going to be bruised, but it convinced him that he didn't want to face another.

Otherwise I agree with you, but if all you're going to do is piss him off, you need to have a better backup plan.

I've shot at people who tried to steal a car in the past (I think I winged him), and I won't hesitate to do so again. I work hard for what I have and I don't have it in me to give them a chance to do it again without some sort of consequence.

Never could understand the mentality of people that like to steal other people's stuff for a living.