AtticaFlinch

A friend's vehicle was robbed... er, burgled in a secured parking garage not too long ago. The only imporatant thing taken was a laptop, but a window had also been broken. When a cop did finally arrive (two hours after they'd been called, no less), he told us he wasn't actually there to deal with us, but had responded to a different call for something entirely different that had occurred even earlier. He acted put out, with heavy sighing, when we asked if he wouldn't mind helping us too. He quickly jotted a few things down in a notebook, then tore off a sheet of paper which he handed to us with the words, "Here, give this to your insurance provider." "Is that it?" "The insurance company will handle the rest." "Is there going to be an investigation?" "We'll contact some pawn shops and see if the computer turns up." "Aren't you going to dust for fingerprints? This might be someone who's already in the system." "No. We'll contact you if we find anything." Oh yeah, one more note about this cop's usefulness... This vehicle was one of about a dozen that was burgled in that garage. Other people were standing around waiting for a cop to show up. All in all, about a dozen cars were burgled, but that cop tore off out of the garage, leaving several people waiting, biding their time to get their turn with the cop. He didn't want to waste his time dealing with an actual crime, of which when all the vehicle damages were added together, and all the stolen goods were added together, could have most likely led to a felony arrest had even a tiny amount of investigation been done. This isn't an isolated incident. This happens all the time, in Houston and elsewhere. If cops had a purpose beyond acting as a creative tax revenue generator, I'd be less cynical about them. I have been robbed before. My own vehicle has been burgled before. I've had a traffic accident before. I never call the cops because I don't need to wait several hours for them to appear just to tell me to call my insurance agent. I can handle that simple task without their intervention. As far as the shooting them thing goes, c'mon, was that necessary? Are you implying simply because I don't think most cops are very useful I want them to die? What an odd leap of logic.

Yeah, the Rice student is still at large. She was probably the brains of the outfit. The others were probably the muscle.

I've got a high school letter jacket in "forensics." I don't think I've ever worn it, not even once. It was enough that people assumed I was going to look at corpses when in reality I was just going to present the affirmative argument in a Lincoln-Douglas styled debate. I agree though, it makes no sense. Over the years I've grown accustomed to having people not quite comprehend exactly what it was that I do. When I was a practicing archaeologist, family members would constantly send me newpaper and magazine clippings about recently discovered dinosaurs. It didn't matter how many times I explained it, they'd keep sending it. Same with forensics. Eventually, as with the archaeology, I settled on letting people assume I spent one weekend a month looking at dead bodies. But, you HAIFers are a sharp lot. I knew none of you would want to operate under false assumptions. AtticaFlinch = always here to help

At one point, I lived two blocks from that restaurant and never once noticed it. I walked by it all the time too. If it's slated for demolition, does that mean something will be done with the property? I can't imagine anyone would spend the money to tear that place down even if it was unsafe. It's only a single story building, it wouldn't really hurt anyone even if it collapsed. Something must be going on.

If you're relying on the cops to do more than help generate city and county revenue by writing tickets, you'll end up disappointed. Looking after each other is the only way to stop criminals.

If you go near Rice, watch out for errant BBs.

If you shop at Meijer, you get to say you don't shop at Target or Walmart.

Or maybe it was three pandas and there was never even a pinata in the first place... Come to think of it, I think it was actually a fight over the spoils of a ruptured bladder. I don't know, my witness had eaten a nickle bag of mushrooms and only saw the event out of the corner of his eyes as he was busy licking a tree at the time.

Forensics is another term for a speech and debate squad as well as the science of criminology. It's sorta confusing, I know, but forensics tournaments have nothing to do with giving awards, judging speed and accuracy for teams and individuals, for analyzing dead bodies to determine time and cause of death. The reality of a forensics tournament is considerably less exciting than that. In other words, the student may not have been trained to cover her tracks, but she'd be trained to convince others she had nothing to do with the crime.

Well, I heard a completely different story... had something to do with two escaped panda bears, a one-eyed man, thirty-three circus clowns and one Volkswagen Beetle, the old kind. It had something to do with who kept the spoils from a ruptured pinata. Or so I hear.

We can turn the Dome into a giant indoor seascape, filling it with sharks and whales and sea anemones. That way, when people say, as they inevitably will, "Galveston sucks," we can direct them to the Astrogulf. The train goes right to it, and it's near the middle of town. No more pesky 50 minute drives!

Why don't you open a studio here and start a trend? You can be the Tyler Perry of Houston.

I'm having a little difficulty understanding the mechanics of it all. How is it possible to simultaneously drink beer and bite someone? It seems impossible to me... unless, maybe the dog was using a straw and a beer helmet.

Beats my previous money saver flight plans to Alaska: Take Southwest to Love Field, hop a shuttle to DFW, catch the flight to Seattle and then on to Juneau. Houston direct to Seattle makes much more sense. I wish they'd thought of this several years ago.

I've said before (though not here) they should turn Westheimer/Elgin and Alabama into one-way streets beginning at Weslayan, with Alabama heading into town and Westheimer/Elgin heading out. It would spur further development on the underutilized Alabama and would remarkably reduce traffic jams at the less wieldy intersections. The only problem would be in redesigning Weslayan to handle the additional traffic at the split. Then we can put as many midrises in Montrose as we want.

As long as Disco Kroger and Aladdin are allowed to survive, I'm cool with whatever they do to the intersection. Frankly, I'd love to see that unsightly strip mall disappear, so long as Half Priced Books is moved somewhere that's still convenient. The Spec's is sorta redundant considering the big Spec's is only about a mile away. I've yet to be impressed by 369, and Quizno's and Papa John's could easily and cheaply move to a different location. I just hope that if a midrise complex is built there it's allowed to complement the neighborhood instead of being an out-of-place cookie-cutter yuppie complex.

I did Lankford Grocery for the first time yesterday for lunch. It was out-freakin'-standing. But, judging by this thread, there are even better joints in town. I think Sparkle is definitely going to be a lunch destination some time next week. Any other recommendations out west, more in the Memorial City vicinity, as I office over here (aside from Beck's Prime)?

Why stop there? I say we round up the Jews, the gays and the gypsies too. <insert smiley face so nobody mistakes the blatant joke>

I've wondered the same thing about this intersection. Some businesses that have recently closed had survived for decades there. It's sad to see, in such a vibrant neighborhood, that the intersection that's essentially ground zero Montrose would have so many shuttered buildings. The Blockbuster strip is at only half capacity, with the Half Price, the Spec's outlet, Quizno's, 369 and a Papa John's on the back side. I wonder if the intersection is in for a mid-rise reimagining a la Kirby and Westheimer.

Is the Brewery Tap a brew pub? Those are great places. I like drinking small batch beers. There used to be another one in Houston, a little less than a decade ago, called The Bank Draft, just outside Rice Village. I wonder what happened to that place.

The only place inside 610 they're called that is Mudbug Hole (aka River Oaks). Whatever you call them, don't refer to them as crayfish. That'll get some stares and an occasional "Y'ain't ferm aroun' here, is ya?".

When I first moved back to Houston just over two years ago and then maybe about six months after that. I haven't returned since. I've never been to the Wet Spot, but I'd be curious to take a customer there just to see the reaction from the accounting department when my T&Es have to be approved. "You went to the where? The Wet Spot? Is that a lesbian bar? A strip club?"

Must have been an off night. Or perhaps the only two times I've been there, they were hosting the Semi-Annual Douchebag Convention. Er... I guess it's pretty odd that I'd show up on Dbag nights.

Did they make you pop your collar before they allowed you into the Tavern?

What's the antonym of hellhole?