musicman Posted May 2, 2007 Share Posted May 2, 2007 Midtown said " I just wanted to understand how two gay men (or two gay women) can have children.Who does who in the what now?Are all of musicman's gay friends with kids ex-breeders? "some of the ones I know ARE "ex-breeders" according to how the word is used in the gay community. But i also know some that had children as gay people. that is why when i hear gays use the word breeders as a derogatory comment, i think they are juvenile because gays have children too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pumapayam Posted May 2, 2007 Share Posted May 2, 2007 Midtown said " I just wanted to understand how two gay men (or two gay women) can have children. My boyfriend was married and has a biological child and later adopted 2 more girls, both with married. They got a divorce and has joint custody of the biological and full custody of the adopted ones. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sevfiv Posted May 2, 2007 Share Posted May 2, 2007 it was my perception that "acquiring" children was a standard process (sex, adoption, black market, etc) no what the matter sexual orientation... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MidtownCoog Posted May 2, 2007 Share Posted May 2, 2007 oy vey Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jeebus Posted May 2, 2007 Share Posted May 2, 2007 My boyfriend was married and has a biological child and later adopted 2 more girls, both with married.They got a divorce and has joint custody of the biological and full custody of the adopted ones. So is it standard practice for gay men who want biological kids to decieve straight women into marrying them, getting them pregnant, having their children, then come out of the closet? I ask only because this is not the first time I've heard of the: "I was married with kids, then got a divorce, now my gay lover and I have custody.." scenario before. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MidtownCoog Posted May 2, 2007 Share Posted May 2, 2007 Isn't that the plot of the movie Bareback Mountin'? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
houstonmacbro Posted May 2, 2007 Share Posted May 2, 2007 My boyfriend was married and has a biological child and later adopted 2 more girls, both with married.They got a divorce and has joint custody of the biological and full custody of the adopted ones. My ex was like that too. Had joint custody of his two kids that lived with us part time. He claims his wife knew at the time they were married. I have no idea whether that is true or not. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
musicman Posted May 2, 2007 Author Share Posted May 2, 2007 So is it standard practice for gay men who want biological kids to decieve straight women into marrying them, getting them pregnant, having their children, then come out of the closet? or women. I think deceive might not be the best word. In some instances it is deception but probably not most. i know a lesbian couple who wanted children and they ended up getting together with a gay guy. they split and the guy now shares joint custody with one of the lesbians. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TJones Posted May 2, 2007 Share Posted May 2, 2007 So is it standard practice for gay men who want biological kids to decieve straight women into marrying them, getting them pregnant, having their children, then come out of the closet? I ask only because this is not the first time I've heard of the: "I was married with kids, then got a divorce, now my gay lover and I have custody.." scenario before.It happens alot, I have witnessed it firsthand with a teacher I had in Highschool. My father started dating the now recent ex-wife of this teacher who "came out" after about 10 years of marriage, and they had an 8 yr old son. I was 17 at the time, and a Senior, and was told by my father not to say anything to anyone at school, so as NOT to jeapodize his career. Now, you have to know my father to realize just how big a step that was for my father to worry about some gay guy's career. He was the mold to which the modern day rightwing christian wingnut is modeled after. As luck would have it, I was assigned to this teacher's English class but was immediately withdrawn and put into another class because of the situation. The teacher knew who I was, and who my father was now with his ex-wife, so it would not have been a good scene. The funny thing is that pretty much everyone at school KNEW this teacher was gay even before he came out. I don't think it is "standard practice", I just think it was how lives were led back in the 50's ,60's, on into the 70's. Boys grew up knowing that you were to like girls, marry them and have babies. Doesn't matter if you have some strange feelings inside when you are showering with the other guys after football practice, you WILL marry a girl and have some babies, because that is how 1960's America is. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
musicman Posted May 2, 2007 Author Share Posted May 2, 2007 Doesn't matter if you have some strange feelings inside when you are showering with the other guys after football practice, you WILL marry a girl and have some babies, because that is how 1960's America is.60's?? LOL i see it now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pumapayam Posted May 2, 2007 Share Posted May 2, 2007 So is it standard practice for gay men who want biological kids to decieve straight women into marrying them, getting them pregnant, having their children, then come out of the closet? I ask only because this is not the first time I've heard of the: "I was married with kids, then got a divorce, now my gay lover and I have custody.." scenario before. No Jeebus, he was questioning his sexuality at the time. Both he and his wife at the time were foster parents, when they seperated, she did not want to be a foster mother to the two girls, and only focus on the biological child, so he took on the responsibility. She could have cared less, as she did not make the effort to fight back. They got a divorce because she was a biatch and cold hearted, so he divorced her. He did not tell he we was gay until years later, to which she would use against him for the adoption process to ruin it, because all of the sudden she cares ten months later. Fortunately it worked out and she has no claims to those girls. Isn't that the plot of the movie Bareback Mountin'? That was funny the first one hundred times I heard that on the internet, radio, tv, friends, etc. Boys grew up knowing that you were to like girls, marry them and have babies. Doesn't matter if you have some strange feelings inside when you are showering with the other guys after football practice, you WILL marry a girl and have some babies, because that is how 1960's America is. It's a lot of pressure to conform, and when you are confused and on the fence why you feel this way, you still make it work, and he did just that. Again, as hard as it may seem to believe, by boyfriends divorce had nothing to do with him being gay. They just feel out of love. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TJones Posted May 2, 2007 Share Posted May 2, 2007 It's a lot of pressure to conform, and when you are confused and on the fence why you feel this way, you still make it work, and he did just that. Again, as hard as it may seem to believe, by boyfriends divorce had nothing to do with him being gay. They just feel out of love.Your boyfriend is much older than you huh ? He grew up in the 60's. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pumapayam Posted May 2, 2007 Share Posted May 2, 2007 Your boyfriend is much older than you huh ? He grew up in the 60's. 20 years older actually, he was born in 1959. He is a sexy muscle daddy! We celebrate our one year anniversary next Thursday! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TJones Posted May 2, 2007 Share Posted May 2, 2007 He is a sexy muscle daddy! I could have gone ALL YEAR without reading THAT ! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
krix Posted May 2, 2007 Share Posted May 2, 2007 the New York Times Sunday Magazine had a long reportage on the relationship of gay sperm donors to lesbian parents, it is still accessible (you might have to register though) for free here. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pumapayam Posted May 2, 2007 Share Posted May 2, 2007 I could have gone ALL YEAR without reading THAT ! That was not even that graphic, but I will say that he is one of the big burly goateed bears with really a rocking bod! I am technically a "cub" since I am younger and smaller than he, but not techinically a dad/son type thing. the New York Times Sunday Magazine had a long reportage on the relationship of gay sperm donors to lesbian parents, it is still accessible (you might have to register though) for free here. They have a story arch on Showtimes' QAF that focused on that subject. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TJones Posted May 2, 2007 Share Posted May 2, 2007 That was not even that graphic, but I will say that he is one of the big burly goateed bears with really a rocking bod!I am technically a "cub" since I am younger and smaller than he, but not techinically a dad/son type thing. They have a story arch on Showtimes' QAF that focused on that subject. That is why I have HBO ! Closest thing to "QAF" on HBO is "Oz". I don't watch that either. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jm1fd Posted May 2, 2007 Share Posted May 2, 2007 20 years older actually, he was born in 1959. He is a sexy muscle daddy!*SHIVER*You don't feel like you're sorta ____ing your father? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
VicMan Posted May 2, 2007 Share Posted May 2, 2007 Midtown said " I just wanted to understand how two gay men (or two gay women) can have children.Who does who in the what now?Are all of musicman's gay friends with kids ex-breeders? "some of the ones I know ARE "ex-breeders" according to how the word is used in the gay community. But i also know some that had children as gay people. that is why when i hear gays use the word breeders as a derogatory comment, i think they are juvenile because gays have children too.They can use a surrogate woman - I.E. the sister of one of the partners and the other partner. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pumapayam Posted May 2, 2007 Share Posted May 2, 2007 *SHIVER*You don't feel like you're sorta ____ing your father?Some can see it that way, but age is not an issue with us. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
houstonmacbro Posted May 3, 2007 Share Posted May 3, 2007 *SHIVER*You don't feel like you're sorta ____ing your father?My dad didn't look like the 'dads' of today. LOLAlthough my dad, before he passed, was a 'daddy'. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
webdude Posted May 3, 2007 Share Posted May 3, 2007 *SHIVER*You don't feel like you're sorta ____ing your father?Using this weird analogy, guys with same age girlfriends would feel like they are sorta of ____ing their sister (ie if they have a sister) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GREASER Posted May 3, 2007 Share Posted May 3, 2007 20 yr old difference in sibblings?? thats weird Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
musicman Posted May 3, 2007 Author Share Posted May 3, 2007 20 yr old difference in sibblings?? thats weirdmy officemate is 36 and he has siblings in their 50's. my dad's siblings also vary by a considerable number to the point where he has a nephew almost his age. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Howard Posted May 3, 2007 Share Posted May 3, 2007 My ex wifes mothers adopted Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jeebus Posted May 3, 2007 Share Posted May 3, 2007 That was not even that graphic, but I will say that he is one of the big burly goateed bears with really a rocking bod!I am technically a "cub" since I am younger and smaller than he, but not techinically a dad/son type thing.In prison I think they call that something else.Using this weird analogy, guys with same age girlfriends would feel like they are sorta of ____ing their sister (ie if they have a sister)Or guys with guyfriends the same age would fee like they are boffing their brother! Crazy! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
musicman Posted May 3, 2007 Author Share Posted May 3, 2007 In prison I think they call that something else.LOL Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pumapayam Posted May 3, 2007 Share Posted May 3, 2007 My dad didn't look like the 'dads' of today. LOLAlthough my dad, before he passed, was a 'daddy'.Your boyfriend died on you. . . how tragic.How old are his kids now? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MidtownCoog Posted May 3, 2007 Share Posted May 3, 2007 That sperm donar story makes Anna Nicole's baby-dady drama look tame.I am not so sure that bringing a life into the world should be such an experiment. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pumapayam Posted May 3, 2007 Share Posted May 3, 2007 That sperm donar story makes Anna Nicole's baby-dady drama look tame.I am not so sure that bringing a life into the world should be such an experiment.Well, you have to either do that or adopt if you want to make a kids. Two guys can't magically make a baby on their own, and likewise same with the ladies. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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