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memebag

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Everything posted by memebag

  1. memebag
    How will we know which people can hang out in midtown and which people can't? Maybe we should tattoo anyone who can't produce proof of a mortgage to clarify that.
  2. memebag
    What do you mean? Give them homes? Kill them? Put them in camps?
  3. memebag
    I know, I just like doing everything I can to spread the fear of malls among our aging population.
  4. memebag
    Killowbrook.
  5. memebag
    See Austin Chronicle story for details. It's at the Austin Music Hall. Tickets are $15 in advance, $20 at the door.
  6. memebag
    What is a "demographic center"? I can sort of understand the center of a demographic, but I can't get my head around Houston having a "demographic center".
  7. memebag
    It can be shocking to Children of the Sprawl like me and Brain when we discover how much those city-slicker eggheads who tell us how we should be using our land are actually paying for parking. I got my first downtown job in my late 30s. Up until then I kind of assumed parking was free everywhere for everyone, like air. Paying $6 a day just to park my car seemed like madness.
  8. memebag
    Welcome to density! The TMC land under your car is expensive. If you want cheap or free parking, you have to drive to a doctor on less expensive property.
  9. memebag
    How are they getting around the liability stuff? I always heard that's what killed the old skate parks.
  10. memebag
    I still call the downtown ballpark "EFUS" (Enron Field at Union Station).
  11. memebag
    Attempts don't count?
  12. memebag
    I'm a native and I've never heard it called "Big Airport". It's always been "Intercontinental", and always will be.
  13. memebag
    Chill. All the roads are, like, connected. Totally. It's only our limited perception of time and space and vibrancy that keep us from seeing that all roads are the same road. And you can't step into the same road twice, because, like, the road is always changing and so are you. Dig it.
  14. memebag
    Amen. Mr. Garrison: Chef, what did you do when white people stole your culture? Chef: Oh. Well, we black people just always tried to stay out in front of them. Mr. Slave: [straightens up] How did you do that? Chef: Well, like with our slang. Black people always used to say, "I'm in the house" instead of "I'm here." But then white people all started to say "in the house" so we switched it to "in the hizzouse." Hizzouse became hizzizzouse, and then white folk started saying that, and we had to change it to hizzie, then "in the hizzle" which we had to change to "hizzle fo shizzle," and now, because white people say "hizzle fo shizzle," we have to say "flippity floppity floop." Mr. Garrison: [slumps forward] We don't have time for all that, Chef! Oh, if only those Queer Eye For the Straight Guy people understood what they were doing. [thinks] Wait. [rises] That's it! I know exactly what to do! [yanks on Mr. Slave's leash] Come on, Mr. Slave! Let's get back to our flippity floppity floop. [exits the front door with Mr. Slave] Chef: Oh no! Damnit! Don't call it that! [the door closes]
  15. memebag
    Have you attended my crawlspace?
  16. memebag
    I don't get the excitement over this. Are the insides of these Chinese prisoners really more interesting than the insides of the hobos in my crawlspace?
  17. memebag
    I haven't bought a newspaper in over 10 years. Where they sell ad space, and promise our eyeballs to advertisers. Newspaper sales don't amount to diddly anymore. Advertising is where the money comes from (just like the HAIF).
  18. memebag
    It was made for some guy named "Rob". That's the 2nd Royal Arch Cypher, for all you Masons keeping score at home.
  19. memebag
    I made you a cake, but then I eated it.
  20. memebag
    I hate you for pulling my chain like that, but then I forgive you for finding the wonder in my snarkiness.
  21. memebag
    Why? They are a Christian theater group.
  22. memebag
    When I was a kid my mom dragged me to the downtown Foleys a couple of times. Since it's been Macy's, I've only been once, when I forgot to wear a belt to work and needed to buy one in a hurry. The saleslady said they get a lot of that.
  23. memebag
    "Anno Domini", Latin for "in the year of our lord."
  24. memebag
    Just because you weren't getting any doesn't mean other kids were less sexually active in the 40s than they are today.
  25. memebag
    Last time I checked (a couple of years ago, I think) the Kroger on S. Post Oak did that.
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