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Anything You Want


gwilson

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I think giving an example might only present the opportunity to be bias and subjective. But if I must...

Murder

Water is wet

so a better question might be does truth exist independently, outside of the perception of any human being. if it does, then you would be a universalist, and truth ultimately would be one-sided. if it doesn't, you might still be a universalist, but you could be a relativist, and then it might not always be one-sided (it's hard to deny that water is always wet, when that's one of the usually agreed upon qualities of water, but murder. . .is it murder or manslaughter, for example. i think there's usually a bias or subjectivity associated with truth.

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Weird story of the week: I came home from work last night to a voice mail from the Harris County Medical Examiner's office.

:o

Turn out that a certain Ricardo Martinez, who has been givng out a bogus phone number to people that happens to be our home number, is the victim of a homicide.

We've been dealing with bill collectors for this dude for 3 years now. The problem is, when you cite FTC reg and tell them to stop harassing you, eventually they turn the list of deadbeats over to another collection agency, and the cycle starts all over again. Maybe now that dude is dead, we can give them the ME's case number and the calls will stop.

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Weird story of the week: I came home from work last night to a voice mail from the Harris County Medical Examiner's office.

:o

Turn out that a certain Ricardo Martinez, who has been givng out a bogus phone number to people that happens to be our home number, is the victim of a homicide.

We've been dealing with bill collectors for this dude for 3 years now. The problem is, when you cite FTC reg and tell them to stop harassing you, eventually they turn the list of deadbeats over to another collection agency, and the cycle starts all over again. Maybe now that dude is dead, we can give them the ME's case number and the calls will stop.

Does seem like karma finally caught up with him. I wonder who he finally pissed off. Ohwell.

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Weird story of the week: I came home from work last night to a voice mail from the Harris County Medical Examiner's office.

:o

Turn out that a certain Ricardo Martinez, who has been givng out a bogus phone number to people that happens to be our home number, is the victim of a homicide.

We've been dealing with bill collectors for this dude for 3 years now. The problem is, when you cite FTC reg and tell them to stop harassing you, eventually they turn the list of deadbeats over to another collection agency, and the cycle starts all over again. Maybe now that dude is dead, we can give them the ME's case number and the calls will stop.

My next door neighbor is a deputy ME. Do you want me to ask what he died of? :)

Whoa! It just occurred to me. One neighbor is a deputy medical examiner, carving up dead bodies for a living. My other neighbor is an artist who uses cremated human remains as his medium. How creepy is THAT? :unsure:

Man, it's like D

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Today I was in the garden section of Home Depot and out of nowhere started thinking about that song "The Way" by Fastball. It was a moderate hit in the late '90s. No more than 10 minutes later it starts playing over the speakers!

Likewise, either this morning or yesterday morning, again out of nowhere, I was thinking about Olestra and how I hadn't heard anything about it in a long time and wondered if it was still being used in foods. A little while ago I was reading Ken Hoffman's column in the early edition of the Chronicle and someone wrote in asking about Olestra!

I don't like this at all.

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My next door neighbor is a deputy ME. Do you want me to ask what he died of? :)

Whoa! It just occurred to me. One neighbor is a deputy medical examiner, carving up dead bodies for a living. My other neighbor is an artist who uses cremated human remains as his medium. How creepy is THAT? :unsure:

It just occurred to you? :ph34r: I think you knew that before moving in. Freak. Halloween party at Red's!

We got them to fess up it was homicide but decided they might think it weird if we started getting too specific with our questions. So, what do you think-- percentages on gunshot vs. knife?

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It just occurred to you? :ph34r: I think you knew that before moving in. Freak. Halloween party at Red's!

We got them to fess up it was homicide but decided they might think it weird if we started getting too specific with our questions. So, what do you think-- percentages on gunshot vs. knife?

Hmmm....Hallowe'en is on a Friday this year. :o

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I was doing some shopping at the Galleria, and we saw something that made my friend Brittany say "Mama Mee moo maahh meeyyyaammi!" (from the Will Smith Song). Well we ended up going to American Apparel on Westheimer and as soon as we walked through the door, Will Smith's "Miami" was playing.

yay

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Wow, she definitely updated it, but it lost the energy of the original.

Strange cover overall. :unsure:

Okay, I need to inject a little quality here. Here is one of the most beautiful, sad songs ever written:

Listen to it all the way through. Dude steals food for his family, gets shipped off to prison in Australia. So sad.

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012907f.jpgStoked!! Death Race is out next Friday. Jason Statham completely rocks. More shirtless, pantless scenes, please.

I actually remember Death Race 2000. Racers got points for running over pedestrians. Gotta love the 70s apocalyptic future films. statham-deathrace-fl.jpg

Edited by crunchtastic
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Yeah after seeing one of his movies, and then the same one with a different title, no way I fall for that again. Completely pointless.

pointless, yes. Cheesy, check. But it's my guilty pleasure. He must have some deal going, he's on the cover of Men's Health like 4 times a year it seems. When he is, I am the furtive woman at the magazine stand in Borders looking at the pictures. Well, me and 3 or 4 gay men. One time I made embarrassing eye contact with a guy while rifling through the magazine, so I said "I'm getting workout tips!" and we both just bust up laughing cuz we were doing the same crude ogling and nothing more.

I know you guys watch bad movies just for the eye candy, too. ;)

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pointless, yes. Cheesy, check. But it's my guilty pleasure. He must have some deal going, he's on the cover of Men's Health like 4 times a year it seems. When he is, I am the furtive woman at the magazine stand in Borders looking at the pictures. Well, me and 3 or 4 gay men. One time I made embarrassing eye contact with a guy while rifling through the magazine, so I said "I'm getting workout tips!" and we both just bust up laughing cuz we were doing the same crude ogling and nothing more.

I know you guys watch bad movies just for the eye candy, too. ;)

Damn straight I do! My eye candy just comes in a different flavor. I'm not about to claim that I don't watch things that are completely idiotic. Wait, no, I loved Wild Things for the cinematic presentation.

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Ashley Tisdale is singing now? I want to shoot the following people:

1. The idiot that licensed her cover.

2. The idiot that did the musical production (you call that music?)

3. The idiot that told her this was a good idea.

4. The idiot that didn't say "hell no" when they asked for studio time to record this.

5. The idiot that put it on a record and distributed it.

6. The idiot that took the time to encode it for YouTube.

7. The idiot @ YouTube who allowed it.

8. The idiot who lied to her and told her he had talent. I hope she is good on her knees and that is what motivated him.

9. Her.

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Your Friday is not complete without reading a lame joke email forward. . .

Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road?

BARACK OBAMA:

The chicken crossed the road because it was time for a CHANGE! The chicken wanted CHANGE!

JOHN MCCAIN:

My friends, that chicken crossed the road because he recognized the need to engage in cooperation and dialogue with all the chickens on the other side of the road.

HILLARY CLINTON:

When I was First Lady, I personally helped that little chicken to cross the road. This experience makes me uniquely qualified to ensure -- right from Day One! -- that every chicken in this country gets the chance it deserves to cross the road. But then, this really isn't about me.......

DR. PHIL:

The problem we have here is that this chicken won't realize that he must first deal with the problem on 'THIS' side of the road before it goes after the problem on the 'OTHER SIDE' of the road. What we need to do is help him realize how stupid he's acting by not taking on h is 'CURRENT' problems before adding 'NEW' problems.

OPRAH:

Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is why he wants to cross this road so bad. So instead of having the chicken learn from his mistakes and take falls, which is a part of life, I'm going to give this chicken a car so that he can just drive across the road and not live his life like the rest of the chickens.

GEORGE W. BUSH:

We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or not. The chicken is either against us, or for us. There is no middle ground here.

COLIN POWELL:

Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite image of the chicken crossing the road...

ANDERSON COOPER - CNN:

We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet been allowed to have access to the other side of the road.

JOHN KERRY:

Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am now against it! It was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about the chicken's intentions. I am not for it now, and will remain against it.

NANCY GRACE:

That chicken crossed the road because he's GUILTY! You can see it in his eyes and the way he walks.

MARTHA STEWART:

No one called me to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had a standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider information.

DR SEUSS:

Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've not been told.

ERNEST HEMINGWAY:

To die in the rain. Alone.

GRANDPA:

In my day we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough.

BARBARA WALTERS:

Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heart warming story of how it experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to accomplish its life long dream of crossing the road.

ARISTOTLE:

It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

JOHN LENNON:

Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together, in peace.

BILL GATES:

I have just released eChicken2007, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your check book. Internet Explorer is an integral part of the Chicken. This new platform is much more stable and will never cra...#@&&^(C% ......... reboot.

ALBERT EINSTEIN:

Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath the chicken?

BILL CLINTON:

I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What is your definition of chicken?

AL GORE:

I invented the chicken!

COLONEL SANDERS:

Did I miss one?

DICK CHENEY:

Where's my gun?

Here is the video version of the above with cartoonish impersonations.

CHICKEN CROSSES ROAD VIDEO

Edited by Pumapayam
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[quote name='houstonmacbro' date='Sunday, August 31st, 2008 @ 3:44pm' post='274662

quite a while now. Especially KY warming, at least as evidenced by the ads I've seen on daytime network tv, complete with $2 coupons in the Sunday paper supplement. You know, those stressed out soccer moms need a backrub!

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pointless, yes. Cheesy, check. But it's my guilty pleasure. He must have some deal going, he's on the cover of Men's Health like 4 times a year it seems. When he is, I am the furtive woman at the magazine stand in Borders looking at the pictures. Well, me and 3 or 4 gay men. One time I made embarrassing eye contact with a guy while rifling through the magazine, so I said "I'm getting workout tips!" and we both just bust up laughing cuz we were doing the same crude ogling and nothing more.

I know you guys watch bad movies just for the eye candy, too. ;)

Is that what pedophiles say during Powder or Jeepers Creepers 2?

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Ok, I have had it with Gyms... I am getting a Bowflex. I just tried to cancel my membership at Power Shack Gym (in Abilene) and they told me I could only cancel If I move 50 miles outside Abilene... So I am going in there (again) tomorrow and tell them I'm moving.

Why did you want to cancel?

I gave up on gyms too. I got sick of the snideness and rudeness and felt that I was better off working out on my own. Bye, bye 24.

They comped me a month to see if I would change my mind.

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Gyms, bleh. Ballys is the worst!!! Always trying to sell you on their lame, expensive, barely-credentialed personal trainers.

How do you workout at home guys do it? I'm having a really difficult time with motivation lately. I need a workout intervention to get back on track. How much does a real personal trainer cost? Someone who's not just going to talk on his bluetooth while I do stuff with the medicine ball.

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Ok, I have had it with Gyms... I am getting a Bowflex. I just tried to cancel my membership at Power Shack Gym (in Abilene) and they told me I could only cancel If I move 50 miles outside Abilene... So I am going in there (again) tomorrow and tell them I'm moving.

Doesn't even come close to an actual gym. Nothing beats free weights and the specialized equipment in gyms...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Different topic...

I've been looking and looking for a truck... run across this ad on craigslist:

It's a truck. It's old. It runs great. Cold A/C. Take it or leave it.

I don't give a damn anymore. I have no use for it after buying a new truck. I probably won't respond to your email if you offer some stupid "low ball" price. I really don't care to answer any more emails about the stupid crap people think about. Yes I farted on the seats. Yes I spilled coffee on the floor boards. Yes I banged on the steering wheel when I sat in traffic for no reason. Yes my wife backed into a tree and dented the bumper and tailgate. Yes I know it's ugly - and I don't care. The truck is 13 years old. Don't be retarded - I could care less if your brother's best friend's cousin just bought the same truck for 1,000 bucks. If it was a piece of crap, I'd be selling it for $500 bucks. It's not - so I won't. Email me if you actually have a clue and $1,900 bucks. Don't expect too much information - the stupid people have ruined it for everyone else. Make a reasonable offer ($1,900) and I will share some more info and pictures if I feel like it.

Poor guy. I know what he's going through... I love his ad though.

Edited by BryanS
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  • The title was changed to Anything You Want

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