Vertigo58 Posted October 22, 2008 Share Posted October 22, 2008 All's I can say is most of the married guys I know are not faithful. They mess around more than the single people I know. Too much flirtation abounds... everywhere. Just a hint of advice, do not marry an attractive, fit, outgoing person. Unless its a business deal. lol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rammer Posted October 22, 2008 Share Posted October 22, 2008 I'm addicted to water, sleeping, eating, & sex. 'Addiction' is a word misused by the medical community in order to make money. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TJones Posted October 22, 2008 Share Posted October 22, 2008 You know sheeats, the first step to recovery is admitting you have a problem. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sheeats Posted October 22, 2008 Author Share Posted October 22, 2008 You know sheeats, the first step to recovery is admitting you have a problem. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CyKat Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 All's I can say is most of the married guys I know are not faithful. They mess around more than the single people I know. Too much flirtation abounds... everywhere. Just a hint of advice, do not marry an attractive, fit, outgoing person. Unless its a business deal. lol You know Vertigo, that comment says a whole lot more about YOU, then it says about married men. CyKat Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vertigo58 Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 (edited) You know Vertigo, that comment says a whole lot more about YOU, then it says about married men.CyKat Thank you! I did it just for reaction and it worked! All about advertising. but seriously many guys period, are not faithful. Maybe some find that hard to believe. Super rats! but wait a minute! There are also many flirtatious married women that do the same. Yeppers! Edited October 23, 2008 by Vertigo58 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
crunchtastic Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 All's I can say is most of the married guys I know are not faithful. They mess around more than the single people I know. Too much flirtation abounds... everywhere.hmmm. I'd say that of people I know, and know of by association, the women are equally unfaithful these days.On the other hand, there's nothing inherently wrong or unfaithful with flirtatiousness. I find that flirtation makes the world a much more enjoyable place. Just know the boundaries. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vertigo58 Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 hmmm. I'd say that of people I know, and know of by association, the women are equally unfaithful these days.On the other hand, there's nothing inherently wrong or unfaithful with flirtatiousness. I find that flirtation makes the world a much more enjoyable place. Just know the boundaries. All true, in fact it has alot to do with the one watching and perceives as flirting, for example: when meeting a person, then hug or kiss on the cheek another may see as flirting when in fact the person could be an old friend or relative. The viewer just doesnt know and assumes the person is wild and cannot contain themselves. It would be great if we had a sub forum on true stories of some real experiences that we have come across. Hence to be labeled a sex maniac. When in a very visible position where you meet many people on a regular basis, that person is bound to know many people, so when in a crowd many will come up and kiss and or hug or both as a sign of affection. Maybe its a cultural thing too. Some cultures are way subdued and are not as openly affectionate as hmm some. On a recent trip, I met many people from Spain and they thought it was unusual that I just shook their hand. The ladies (gorgeous of course) all kissed me on both sides of the face and a good tight hug. How can you turn that down? Italians are even more.... Santo cielo! I wouldnt call this sex addiction, but thats me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BryanS Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 ...in terms of being "unfaithful"... what do you consider to be unfaithful conduct? Some say that watching porn (and the activity associated with it) and not having sex with your partner is being "unfaithful"... does anyone agree with this premise? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sheeats Posted October 23, 2008 Author Share Posted October 23, 2008 (edited) All true, in fact it has alot to do with the one watching and perceives as flirting, for example: when meeting a person, then hug or kiss on the cheek another may see as flirting when in fact the person could be an old friend or relative. The viewer just doesnt know and assumes the person is wild and cannot contain themselves.I hug and kiss nearly all of my friends when I first greet them and again when we're leaving. I'm also a terrible flirt. But for me, those two things have nothing to do with each other. Hugging and kissing as a form of greeting is nothing more to me than a handshake would be to other people. Interesting perspective, Vertigo... Do others feel that hugging and kissing when greeting/saying goodbye is flirtatious?...in terms of being "unfaithful"... what do you consider to be unfaithful conduct? Some say that watching porn (and the activity associated with it) and not having sex with your partner is being "unfaithful"... does anyone agree with this premise?I suppose that depends on whether or not your partner condones or is aware of the porn viewing. If they know that you're watching Debbie Does Dallas every once in a while and they don't care, then I certainly wouldn't call that cheating. On the other hand, if all you're doing is viewing porn and it interferes with your normal sexual life with your spouse, then I would class that in the "unfaithful" category. And I think at that point, you've crossed over into "disorder" territory, as well. Edited October 23, 2008 by sheeats Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
crunchtastic Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 I hug and kiss nearly all of my friends when I first greet them and again when we're leaving. I'm also a terrible flirt. But for me, those two things have nothing to do with each other. Hugging and kissing as a form of greeting is nothing more to me than a handshake would be to other people. Interesting perspective, Vertigo... Do others feel that hugging and kissing when greeting/saying goodbye is flirtatious?I suppose that depends on whether or not your partner condones or is aware of the porn viewing. If they know that you're watching Debbie Does Dallas every once in a while and they don't care, then I certainly wouldn't call that cheating. On the other hand, if all you're doing is viewing porn and it interferes with your normal sexual life with your spouse, then I would class that in the "unfaithful" category. And I think at that point, you've crossed over into "disorder" territory, as well.Agree with Sheeats on all counts. I would be more hung up on the 'disorder' part than the 'unfaithful' part. And yes, physical greetings and flirting are different things. You can make a greeting flirtatious, but the hug/kiss isn't necessarily so. It all serves the same basic purpose though: greasing the wheels of polite society. Beyond that, there are all kinds of flirting. Sexual flirting to attract the attention of someone you desire is one, but social/recreational flirting takes all forms (from a female perspective): office flirting, and its distinct subset, boss flirting; old man flirting (the kind you do with your father- in-law, for example, or someone's gramps), repairman flirting, fireman/cop/military flirting, gay boyfriend flirting, bartender/waiter flirting....the list goes on and on. Oh, and internet-boyfriend flirting, of course! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vertigo58 Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 but getting back to the question or topic, this jerk Duchovny is mereling using this "addiction thing"as a cop out for wishing he were single again that simple...Super, big rat. and the list goes on with others like him: Scott Peterson Joey Buttafucco John Bobbitt the guy that got run over by wife Harris, etc. These guys simply regret getting married. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ricco67 Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 I would agree with you overall, but every man (and woman) has their own reason for cheating. From the blogs that I have come across, the reasons vary from situation to situation.I am not giving a free pass to cheat, but you can't use the same brush. Either way they are ruining lives. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
marmer Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 Agree with Sheeats on all counts. I would be more hung up on the 'disorder' part than the 'unfaithful' part. And yes, physical greetings and flirting are different things. You can make a greeting flirtatious, but the hug/kiss isn't necessarily so. It all serves the same basic purpose though: greasing the wheels of polite society. Beyond that, there are all kinds of flirting. Sexual flirting to attract the attention of someone you desire is one, but social/recreational flirting takes all forms (from a female perspective): office flirting, and its distinct subset, boss flirting; old man flirting (the kind you do with your father- in-law, for example, or someone's gramps), repairman flirting, fireman/cop/military flirting, gay boyfriend flirting, bartender/waiter flirting....the list goes on and on. Oh, and internet-boyfriend flirting, of course! And I agree with crunch. It's pretty obvious to me the difference between a peck on the cheek and a romantic kiss. Same difference between an above-the-waist-hands-on-the-shoulder-blades hug and a romantic embrace. And we guys have all those kinds of flirting, too. Seems to me like there's an obvious definition of infidelity: when one partner has either sexual or romantic involvements without their partner's knowledge and consent. Pretty much anything else, while potentially problematic for the relationship, is not cheating. Especially differences in sex drive, which are common, though not universal, in heterosexual couples. If one partner is feeling neglected for whatever reason, they need to open their mouths and say something and work it out. But give guys a break about porn. Almost every guy's early sexual experiences center on porn and it's several years before they do anything with a partner. Not to mention it's a way to indulge your kinks without endangering your real life. So, unless it's illegal, like child porn or some kinds of extremely violent stuff, don't label your happy porn consumer a sicko. Dan Savage recommends: guys: hide it and be discreet, don't rub her face in it; girls: look the other way and don't snoop. Everyone then buys into the white lie that there's no porn. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vertigo58 Posted October 24, 2008 Share Posted October 24, 2008 Hey marmer, I do apologize. I got you confused with tmariar on that other thread. I am almost certain she is a female. but I do appreciate that topic. Actually thats a good example to use for this discussion. Sometimes when I talk to ladies I call them darling or honey, etc but in an effectionate way not in a "hitting on" way. Another may take it as a pass or trying to get to 1st base I guess. If you listen to some of the older folks or relatives many of them still talk like they did in the 40's & 50's like "would you get that for me dear" or How are you today doll". Simply being polite and affectionate. Listen to most of the song lyrics of those days they are filled with romance!Nothing wrong with being romantic!I thought most ladies love that? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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