Pride Houston 2011

[totheskies]

Just a personal note,

I have to celebrate that after 3 years of living in the Greater Eastwood area, I have finally made the move to Montrose!! I am very excited to get to live in such a fun and vibrant neighborhood!!

Now back to the thread topic... This year's Pride Festival and Parade promises to be better than ever!! Great festivities, live performances, and lots of good cheer!! For more info on Pride Houston, check it out here:

http://pridehouston.org/ The official site for Pride Houston

https://www.facebook.com/pages/Pride-Houston/339266352854?ref=ts Facebook page.

See you there!!

[ricco67]

Just a personal note,

I have to celebrate that after 3 years of living in the Greater Eastwood area, I have finally made the move to Montrose!! I am very excited to get to live in such a fun and vibrant neighborhood!!

....

Congrats!

Did you buy something? I'm currently looking at Eastwood but haven't found anything I'm happy with.

[totheskies]

Nah, still a renter. An apartment in my friend's complex opened up, and since I love the complex and LOVE the location, I had to snap it up before it went back on the market. I like Eastwood, but Montrose is just so much fun, and I spend a lot of time there anyway.

[totheskies]

I'll be ready to buy in 2-3 years once I get my mom's house settled. Considering how fast EaDO/ Eastwood is building up, I'd really like to buy my first house in that area. The new stadium and rail line should bring lots of improvements and attention to the neighborhood.

[wxman]

As a homosexual, I think Pride parades do more harm than good. Just my two cents. Never been to one and don't plan to start this year.

[HoustonMidtown]

As a homosexual, I think Pride parades do more harm than good. Just my two cents. Never been to one and don't plan to start this year.

If you've never been to one, how do you know ?

[totheskies]

Well just FYI... I am a finalist for this year's Houston Pride SuperStar (formerly Houston Pride Idol). So not only will I be performing to kick off the parade, but I'll also be riding on a parade float. Something I've never done before.

BTW the competition is down to the Top 5 and I'm still in (the only guy left)!! I'll post an update of the results when we have them.

[ricco67]

Well just FYI... I am a finalist for this year's Houston Pride SuperStar (formerly Houston Pride Idol). So not only will I be performing to kick off the parade, but I'll also be riding on a parade float. Something I've never done before.

BTW the competition is down to the Top 5 and I'm still in (the only guy left)!! I'll post an update of the results when we have them.

Well, I might be one of the throngs waiting for you from One's a meal (now called "Theo's!).

As far as Wxman not attending one, I think he should. Houston's is far more conservative than those in other cities, but probably more fun since they are now extending the festivities for the entire week.

[Pumapayam]

Well just FYI... I am a finalist for this year's Houston Pride SuperStar (formerly Houston Pride Idol). So not only will I be performing to kick off the parade, but I'll also be riding on a parade float. Something I've never done before.

BTW the competition is down to the Top 5 and I'm still in (the only guy left)!! I'll post an update of the results when we have them.

Congrats on being a finalist, I know Adrian, I believe he made it to the top 10 or 9, not sure.

[wxman]

THIS IS JUST MY OPINION WHICH MAY OR MAY NOT BE ACCURATE:

I don't see how Pride help's advance the idea of equal rights amongst our peers who are ignorant to the fact that we are normal people who think, feel emotion, bleed, sweat, smile and cry like everybody else. People hate what they do not understand. The Irish faced bigotry at the turn of the last century. Signs in store fronts read 'Irish, need not apply.' Then it was the civil rights movement. Then it was immigration and a socio-economic status of a lot of hispanics that seemed to threaten our ideals and way of life here in America. Now it's gays and the threat of diluting what the true meaning of marriage is and so on. The point is I don't see how guys prancing around in skimpy underwear with legs shaved and dressing like woman advances the cause. I think many are disgusted by it and subjects me to a stereotype that is a total misrepresentation as to who I am. While I don't judge or condemn those that go, I choose not to partake in it because it represents everything I am not. If we as a community want acceptance, we have to show the world that we can love, MONOGAMOUSLY, and treat others with respect (have you been to a *** bar where everybody feels up on everybody) that not only is expected by others but I expect for myself.

AGAIN, THIS IS MY OPINION THAT MAY OR MAY NOT BE ACCURATE.

[KinkaidAlum]

THIS IS JUST MY OPINION...

but I hope you work on your internalized homophobia. All *** guys tend to struggle with these issues. Quite frankly, now that I am 40, I've come to view Pride in much the same way as I view Mardi Gras. Pride isn't about creating change or passing legislation. It's about celebrating our differences and simply having FUN. It's the one time of year that you can feel safe on the streets, act out, hold your boyfriend's hand, and celebrate the utter ridiculousness of roller derby girls inter mingling with Christians while politicians glad handle and go-go boys bounce.

While I don't agree with everything I see out at Pride, I do appreciate the right of others to let their hair down and go wild.

As an aside, I am a preppy-ish guy that hangs out at straight beer joints (99% of my friends are breeders) and loves college football. I don't drink cocktails with umbrellas but love to bring my own koozi to keep the longneck from sweating. I haven't been to a *** bar in years but do look forward to the Pride Parade every year!

My suggestion, come hang out at Poison Girl and have a good time. Quite frankly, there will be 25% of the population that will never accept us so come be with the 75% that already do!

[wxman]

THIS IS JUST MY OPINION...

but I hope you work on your internalized homophobia. All *** guys tend to struggle with these issues. Quite frankly, now that I am 40, I've come to view Pride in much the same way as I view Mardi Gras. Pride isn't about creating change or passing legislation. It's about celebrating our differences and simply having FUN. It's the one time of year that you can feel safe on the streets, act out, hold your boyfriend's hand, and celebrate the utter ridiculousness of roller derby girls inter mingling with Christians while politicians glad handle and go-go boys bounce.

While I don't agree with everything I see out at Pride, I do appreciate the right of others to let their hair down and go wild.

As an aside, I am a preppy-ish guy that hangs out at straight beer joints (99% of my friends are breeders) and loves college football. I don't drink cocktails with umbrellas but love to bring my own koozi to keep the longneck from sweating. I haven't been to a *** bar in years but do look forward to the Pride Parade every year!

My suggestion, come hang out at Poison Girl and have a good time. Quite frankly, there will be 25% of the population that will never accept us so come be with the 75% that already do!

I can relate to your point of view. Perhaps I do have internal homophobia---which is the most hypocritical thing ever. However, being a jock/frat type, you'd never be able to point me out in a crowd as being *** and being seen in an area where people are of free spirit makes me uncomfortable and quite frankly a bit frustrated that i've never been able to get to that point. To the outside world, I am a 'breeder' as you comically put it and so are my friends. While all my friends know and accept me for who I really am, they seem to be more frustrated than me about living a double life. Funny how that works out.

[Highway6]

Why the hell is *** bleeped out ?

[Pumapayam]

*** is not beeped out if you type g a y or _gay

you have to get creative.

[Highway6]

*** is not beeped out if you type g a y or _gay

you have to get creative.

You shouldn't have to be creative. Seems like non-offensive words that are only offensive when used in a derogatory context shouldn't be bleeped.

Or did I miss the memo that said homosexual is not offensive but *** is.

Geez.. if my *** friends expect me to add 4 whole syllables every time I refer to them, they have another thing coming.

Testing.....

I took a poop on the poop deck of the yacht.

"Look at that effin fairy", said the man as he pointed to the small mythical woodland creature fluttering above the pond.

The ass is a beast of burden similar to a mule. When they don't move fast enough, it is sometimes necessary to slap that ass.

The truck on the side of the road was selling Labrador ******* for $100 each.

I won $100 at the cock fight in Cuidad Juarez.

When a Londoner wants a cigarette, he asks for a ***.

***

Dago

Quite arbitrary set up around here. Sorry for digressing.

[KinkaidAlum]

I can relate to your point of view. Perhaps I do have internal homophobia---which is the most hypocritical thing ever. However, being a jock/frat type, you'd never be able to point me out in a crowd as being *** and being seen in an area where people are of free spirit makes me uncomfortable and quite frankly a bit frustrated that i've never been able to get to that point. To the outside world, I am a 'breeder' as you comically put it and so are my friends. While all my friends know and accept me for who I really am, they seem to be more frustrated than me about living a double life. Funny how that works out.

It's the internalized homophobia that makes you feel uncomfortable with "free spirits." There's no way to grow up in this society and not have it. We learn at a very early age that *** is "bad" or at least "different." Little boys know very quickly that the worst thing you can call someone is ***/***/homo/etc... And while the world is more accepting now, those thoughts that we all had as kids of not fitting in, of being different, of being ashamed, can still haunt us.

You and I are way more alike than we are different. I used to get really uncomfortable around flamboyant gays. I used to cringe at the thought of Bears, Twinks, or Leather Daddies and never felt like I had a place in *** culture since not only did I not feel like any of those types, I knew I didn't want to become one either.

But that's the beautiful thing. I don't have to change who I am at my core. I now laugh and call myself "the worst *** man" in the world with my friends. I don't like *** bars. I don't starve myself so that I can fit in at Meteor. I don't have a barbed wire tattoo on my biceps. Heck, I don't have biceps! I have no idea of fashion outside of patagonia, gap, j crew, and t-shirts. I'd rather watch ESPN than Glee. On a Saturday in the fall, you'll find me tailgating or at a sports bar watching college football but will never find me at a *** club. But that doesn't make me less ***. It just makes me, well, me.

My suggestion to you would be to stop getting frustrated for not being able to get to that point and don't judge others that do. Just as all "straights" aren't the same, we aren't either.

I hope this doesn't sound too lecture-y. Just trying to share my experiences with you.

[west20th]

It's the internalized homophobia that makes you feel uncomfortable with "free spirits." There's no way to grow up in this society and not have it. We learn at a very early age that *** is "bad" or at least "different." Little boys know very quickly that the worst thing you can call someone is ***/***/homo/etc... And while the world is more accepting now, those thoughts that we all had as kids of not fitting in, of being different, of being ashamed, can still haunt us.

You and I are way more alike than we are different. I used to get really uncomfortable around flamboyant gays. I used to cringe at the thought of Bears, Twinks, or Leather Daddies and never felt like I had a place in *** culture since not only did I not feel like any of those types, I knew I didn't want to become one either.

But that's the beautiful thing. I don't have to change who I am at my core. I now laugh and call myself "the worst *** man" in the world with my friends. I don't like *** bars. I don't starve myself so that I can fit in at Meteor. I don't have a barbed wire tattoo on my biceps. Heck, I don't have biceps! I have no idea of fashion outside of patagonia, gap, j crew, and t-shirts. I'd rather watch ESPN than Glee. On a Saturday in the fall, you'll find me tailgating or at a sports bar watching college football but will never find me at a *** club. But that doesn't make me less ***. It just makes me, well, me.

My suggestion to you would be to stop getting frustrated for not being able to get to that point and don't judge others that do. Just as all "straights" aren't the same, we aren't either.

I hope this doesn't sound too lecture-y. Just trying to share my experiences with you.

Yes, but you must be categorized. How about HoSchmo? A phrase coined by Barney Frank to describe a_gay man who isn’t particularly fit and has no fashion sense....

[barracuda]

As a homosexual, I think Pride parades do more harm than good. Just my two cents. Never been to one and don't plan to start this year.

Sad. Because we live in a homophobic society, g a y history is not taught in public schools alongside other civil rights issues. It's too scary and uncomfortable for folks who have internalized homophobia. My suggestion is to watch this free documentary (Stonewall Uprising) and/or read some books on how gays have been treated throughout history, and how certain events finally led to the g a y civil rights movement. G a y pride marches started out as a form of political activism and a demand for equal rights that began in earnest with the Stonewall rights. Yes, the g a y community is a varied and sometimes eclectic group, and the political activist streak of pride parades gave way to more of a festive atmosphere as the years went on. But I find it sad for someone to be so bothered by others who are more expressive of their identities, as these are largely the types of people who originally fought for the rights and privileges we all enjoy today, rather than trying to "fit in" with straight society and accept the status quo as second-class citizens hiding their identity in the shadows.

You really ought to reconsider attending at least one pride parade. As others have mentioned, the Houston pride parade is very tame, consisting largely of corporate and organizational floats staffed by folks wearing everyday clothes, so it shouldn't be the least bit uncomfortable. In fact, many of the folks in the parade and audience are straight and are there to show support, sometimes with their families in tow.

[ricco67]

Yes, but you must be categorized. How about HoSchmo? A phrase coined by Barney Frank to describe a_gay man who isn’t particularly fit and has no fashion sense....

I had a friend (self described "militant ***") who called such people as "Actors" or "breeder hags", there was another term he used, but I can't remember other than it was offensive.

I'm not ***, but I like musicals, so I was okay in his book.

[west20th]

I had a friend (self described "militant ***") who called such people as "Actors" or "breeder hags", there was another term he used, but I can't remember other than it was offensive.

I'm not ***, but I like musicals, so I was okay in his book.

Actually, people of that mind set go too far. It is really no one's business is one is straight acting to fit in or a flaming queen to celebrate their _gayness.

"...you are what you is

...you is what you am

...a cow don't make ham"

F. Zappa

[Highway6]

My comments are to be taken separate from the act of going to the parade. Whether is tame or too flamboyant doesn't matter to my following point.

It's been interesting watching this discussion, but I find myself agreeing with wxman.

I don't consider it homophobic for him to have a problem with flamboyant and promiscuous behavior of *** men, but I do find pretty unbelievable that he can be called homophobic by other gays for his beliefs.

He is separating what you are from what you do / how you act and I find that perfectly reasonable.

Since baracuda wants to correlate *** and black -

I see it as the equivalent of calling Bill Cosby a racist for calling out the ghettofied urban african american youth of today, like he has so many times. Bill Cosby isn't racist. He is against the behavior of other blacks who he believes harm themselves and perpetuate a negative image of african americans.

You aren't required to be a ghetto thug if you are black.. Likewise you are not required to be flamboyant and promiscuous in the *** clubs if you are ***. Bringing up the history of gays and *** rights is irrelevant here. American's founding gays hopefully weren't wearing leather chaps and having orgies.

Wxman.. You are not homophobic. Hating how a group of people act and carry themselves is not the same as hating that group of people, including yourself.

I don't think we're going to reach an agreement here. Kinkaid and barracuda, it seems you see how you act as being the same as who you are. And from that point of view, then sure, having *** pride would include being flamboyant and promiscuous. Wxman appears to not share that view since in his original post he pretty eloquently separated what you are and what you do. That does not make him homophobic.

[RedScare]

While Bill Cosby may not be racist, he is certainly acquiescing to the fact that many stereotype blacks. Giving in to the fact of stereotyping, Cosby exhorts other blacks to refrain from 'ghetto' or 'thuggish' behavior, as he believes it paints the entire race with the same broad brush. Similarly, wxman abhors the 'flaming fags', as he believes it paints all gays with that brush.

Are Bill Cosby and wxman bigots? Of course not. Are they succumbing to the narrow minded beliefs system of bigots? Perhaps. Are theying being pragmatic? More than likely.

Personally, I do not find Pride offensive or stereotypical of gays, any more than I find St. Patrick's Day parades offensive for the Irish, or Mardi Gras/Carnival offensive for Catholics. As stated previously, it is a day of celebration, one day of the year when gays need not worry what others think of them. And, while I certainly understand wxman's concerns, I would suggest that little has changed for gays when gays have toned it down. The oppressive ruling class has shown over and over again that 'going along to get along' simply prolongs the status quo. Only discomfort promotes change.

EDIT: Hey, looky there! My 'flaming fags' reference made it through the censors.

[barracuda]

My comments are to be taken separate from the act of going to the parade. Whether is tame or too flamboyant doesn't matter to my following point.

It's been interesting watching this discussion, but I find myself agreeing with wxman.

I don't consider it homophobic for him to have a problem with flamboyant and promiscuous behavior of *** men, but I do find pretty unbelievable that he can be called homophobic by other gays for his beliefs.

He is separating what you are from what you do / how you act and I find that perfectly reasonable.

It's not at all uncommon for gays to have internalized homophobia, although it's more common among those who were brought up in socially conservative families. Hopefully they learn to grow out of this and accept themselves, and avoid the self-destructive behavior that often accompanies the self-loathing brought on by societal homophobia.

Since baracuda wants to correlate *** and black -

I see it as the equivalent of calling Bill Cosby a racist for calling out the ghettofied urban african american youth of today, like he has so many times. Bill Cosby isn't racist. He is against the behavior of other blacks who he believes harm themselves and perpetuate a negative image of african americans.

You aren't required to be a ghetto thug if you are black.. Likewise you are not required to be flamboyant and promiscuous in the *** clubs if you are ***. Bringing up the history of gays and *** rights is irrelevant here. American's founding gays hopefully weren't wearing leather chaps and having orgies.

Promiscuity is of course not a _gay thing; countless straight men cheat on their wives on a frequent basis. I'm not sure what to think of the last comment.

I don't see how history is irrelevant. If you are to understand and appreciate _gay pride, it helps to know the history and to actually attend the event. Wxman is complaining that the g a y pride parade does more harm than good based on assumptions and stereotypes, yet he admits he's never actually been to one. Even if you still find it horrifying, at least your opinions will be based on real-life observations rather than stereotypes. Neither the straight and _gay parents who bring their kids to the parade nor the other 200,000 attendees seem to have a problem with it.

Wxman.. You are not homophobic. Hating how a group of people act and carry themselves is not the same as hating that group of people, including yourself.

I don't think we're going to reach an agreement here. Kinkaid and barracuda, it seems you see how you act as being the same as who you are. And from that point of view, then sure, having *** pride would include being flamboyant and promiscuous. Wxman appears to not share that view since in his original post he pretty eloquently separated what you are and what you do. That does not make him homophobic.

So it's okay to hate how a group of people act, even if those acts are imagined and are stereotypes? Sigh.

[Highway6]

It's not at all uncommon for gays to have internalized homophobia, although it's more common among those who were brought up in socially conservative families. Hopefully they learn to grow out of this and accept themselves, and avoid the self-destructive behavior that often accompanies the self-loathing brought on by societal homophobia.

It sounds like wxman has accepted himself and its you that has the problem with his failure to identify with or accept the flamboyant type.

So it's okay to hate how a group of people act, even if those acts are imagined and are stereotypes? Sigh.

Your 'sigh' is meant to belittle but those acts arent imagined. Wxman gave a first person *** account of his views and observations of gays at a *** club. Flamboyant and promiscuous gays are fact. I myself have been on a strait date where she wanted to go dancing at South Beach. I felt like I was being constantly eye raped by half the guys there. Again.. flamboyant and promiscuous wasn't imagined. They are real observations.

Yes.. it is perfectly acceptable to hate what someone does, how a group acts, actions commonly associated with a group of people.

And as much as liberals hate this - Sterotypes don't materialize out of thin air.. they have roots somewhere.

That being said.. I'm not stereotyping. I would be stereotyping gays if I said, Based on my observations all gays must be therefore flamboyant and promiscuous. I did not say that, nor do I believe that. I have 3 *** family members and I have a few good friends who are strait-laced gays, including one who was a groomsman in my wedding.. I know better. But It is not stereotyping for me to say there are flamboyant and promiscuous gays. That would be stating a fact. And while gays don't have a lock on promiscuous of course, they do on flamboyant.

Again.. all of this is independent of the parade and if it perpetuates that stereotype or not. I think Wxman is entitled to his beliefs without being bashed or called a homophobe.

I've been to the parade twice. I could take it or leave it.

Do I think all gays are just like the flamboyant types on the floats? Of course not.

Does it make me uncomfortable to see all the flamboyant types? Yes, some.

Does that make me a homophobe? Not at all. I don't have to accept those that act in a way i don't approve of nor do I care if they have a problem with that. Wxman doesn't have to approve of people that are the same as him but don't act like him or in a manner he disapproves of.

Do I have a problem with or hate the *** people at the parade? Not at all.

I hate words that end in -phobe. When used, they imply that you fear something that you have no right to fear or hate something you have no right to hate. Wxman isn't a homophobe. He does not fear gays. He does have the right to hate how some gays act though. Me.. I'm a FlamboyantDisapprover.

I live two blocks off Westheimer so the parade is unavoidable.... I'll be going again this year for a bit. Why? Because that's what us conservative stereotyping homophobes do.

[KinkaidAlum]

First things first, I wasn't calling wxman homophobic. There is a difference between homophobia and internalized homophobia.

The historical fact of the matter, as barracuda pointed out, is that it was DRAG QUEENS who started the entire ***** liberation movement. It was their fight against being arrested and harassed simply for congregating together that allowed people like me to come out of the closet. I've come to realize, over time, that those folks who are way more marginalized than I am (since I can easily "pass") deserve my RESPECT.

What I was hoping to get across was that wxman doesn't need to change anything about himself. It's fine to be Freddie Frat Guy and G-A-Y at the same time. I've come to terms with the fact that I am a lousy *** man, although I look hella better than Barney Frank! I prefer to describe myself as "lesbian" when people ask me what sub-species of *** I belong to.

[Highway6]

Well.. Then i apologize for misunderstanding ya.

[KinkaidAlum]

No worries.

Here's Varla Jean Merman, who is simply brilliant, explaining the Stonewall riots of 1969 in New York. Towards the end, she sums it up very well with a line that goes something like "maybe you don't dig to wear a wig" but it was those folks who paved the way.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a3XulgllgDQ

[wxman]

Wow, I feel kinda special that so much interest has been taken in my comments I want you guys to know that I don't take offense to any comments made. I stand by my beliefs that a Pride parade does not advocate for equal rights but rather reinforces negative stereotypes levied against our community. I am a guy. I love college football, outdoor sports, working out and eating pizza until I hurl. I like to drink beer and expel methane. Okay, that's graphic and disgusting but I digress. I like the fact that men get credit for a great bbq when in reality it was a woman (the wife or girlfriend) that prepared the table, veggies and seasoned the meat that we bbq. My point is that is, in many ways, what makes me a guy---aside from my penis. That's important. Being male is great. And all the above comes naturally to me, my dad, uncle, grandfather and countless college buddies--both *** and straight. However, waxing your body down, putting on a pair of panties with you sack hanging out one side is seen as a spectical to a lot of people---including the very people we are begging to get rights from.

The above is my old point. Here is my new point. Why not lead by example? Why not show the world that we are human beings that deserve to have the same privileges as straight married couples. The GLBT community continuously fights over things that will not advance the cause. For example, the word "marriage." The GLBT community demands to have the right to marry. Well some states have allowed 'civil unions.' It offers the exact same hospital visitation rights, the sharing of benefits amongst one another and allows us to adopt and many other things---just like a married couple. Why do we fight over the nomenclature? Some g-a-y people are still mad that it's not called 'marriage.' My dad used to tell me that there is a way to tell somebody to go to hell without telling them to go to hell. Why not take the same logic and settle for the name change in order to have the same rights? Why do guys prance around in panties---which even as a g-a-y guy---I find disturbing. It's not fair to me....somebody who goes to work every day, pays taxes, dresses normally, speaks normally and just wants to go home to a guy who loves me unconditionally---same as any heterosexual couple. But no, my spokesperson represents everything I am not---like a drag queen. Does that just not go against nature???

I really try not to hate. I promise. But I have been silent on the issue for a long time and I feel as though I am speaking amongst a mature group here who is open minded to my thoughts. I think at the end of the day, I believe everybody should share in the same equalities as everybody else. However I am guilty of something that MLK spoke about: "for it is not the words of our enemies that we remember but the silence of our friends in the face of opposition." I know I have not been supportive of the g-a-y cause but until I see a community that can have a monogamous relationships, longevity in those relationships and a change in attitude amongst the community, I can't partake in such events. I know in my heart that the day when we can hold hands with our loved one in public without being chastised is approaching---just like white and black couples can now do. Mark Twain said that the challenges in life make it interesting. It's overcoming them that makes it meaningful. I am cautiously optimistic that the ideals in my community, that I am apart of by force---not choice, will realize that pushing or forcing something not fully understood, ie religion, politics or sexual orientation, is a sure way to create far more foes than friends.

[KinkaidAlum]

I understand and even respect your opinion and feelings.

BUT, I disagree with your notion that those that push for something not fully understood cause us to have more enemies than friends. In fact, I'd argue that it's the exact opposite. From the drag queens in Greenwich Village that rioted in the 1960s, to the ACT UP members who caused civil disobedience in the 1980s, to the marriage equality folks of today who continue to repeat the mantra that separate but equal is not equal at all... these are the folks who push limits and create change. Change is NEVER accepted at first but it always seems to happen. It's one of the things I love most about this country. We always seem to eventually get things right.

The change in attitudes about homosexuality in the last two decades is absolutely astonishing. The reality is, MOST people in this country now believe in equal rights. Most actually support the idea of *** marriage, especially the younger generations who cannot even remember a time when Ellen felt like she had to play straight. Each year, the numbers of folks polled who don't believe in equal rights for the GLBT community grows smaller. The time is coming when those opposed to *** rights will be viewed in much the same way as those who are still opposed to inter-racial marriage or women's equality.

Gays like you and I should THANK those drag queens and AIDS activists for blazing the path that allowed us to come out.

I look back and laugh sometimes about things that felt like such a big deal in the past but now are a dime a dozen. In the mid 1990s, my mother and I did a Houston Post Sunday Lifestyle spread on "coming out." The reason we were chosen? No other parent-child combo in PFLAG Houston was willing to do it. Today, coming out is usually followed by a collective yawn with people wondering why it took you so long (I am looking at you, Ricky Martin!).

[TheNiche]

I understand and even respect your opinion and feelings.

BUT, I disagree with your notion that those that push for something not fully understood cause us to have more enemies than friends. In fact, I'd argue that it's the exact opposite. From the drag queens in Greenwich Village that rioted in the 1960s, to the ACT UP members who caused civil disobedience in the 1980s, to the marriage equality folks of today who continue to repeat the mantra that separate but equal is not equal at all... these are the folks who push limits and create change. Change is NEVER accepted at first but it always seems to happen. It's one of the things I love most about this country. We always seem to eventually get things right.

The change in attitudes about homosexuality in the last two decades is absolutely astonishing. The reality is, MOST people in this country now believe in equal rights. Most actually support the idea of *** marriage, especially the younger generations who cannot even remember a time when Ellen felt like she had to play straight. Each year, the numbers of folks polled who don't believe in equal rights for the GLBT community grows smaller. The time is coming when those opposed to *** rights will be viewed in much the same way as those who are still opposed to inter-racial marriage or women's equality.

Gays like you and I should THANK those drag queens and AIDS activists for blazing the path that allowed us to come out.

I look back and laugh sometimes about things that felt like such a big deal in the past but now are a dime a dozen. In the mid 1990s, my mother and I did a Houston Post Sunday Lifestyle spread on "coming out." The reason we were chosen? No other parent-child combo in PFLAG Houston was willing to do it. Today, coming out is usually followed by a collective yawn with people wondering why it took you so long (I am looking at you, Ricky Martin!).

Kinkaid, I tend to agree with a lot of what you've said. I think that the original Pride Parades with all their freaky incarnations of flaming *** men were worthwhile. I mean, hey, when I'm confronted with a perpetual cycle of injustice and have basically nothing to lose by getting in someone's face about it, that's exactly what I do. It doesn't work easily, and it never works immediately, but it's better than the alternative...which is to do nothing and expect nothing.

But times have changed. Pride Parades (in Houston, at least) are to a point where they've lost meaning. The mission is accomplished. In fact, the mission has been accomplished so well that the *** 'community' no longer really acts as a community. It is scattered to the winds, comfortable in Montrose or suburbia. What's left to accomplish? Everyone is aware of *** men. Nobody is shocked by mildly obscene behavior in a contextually-appropriate, corporate-sponsored, permitted, pre-scheduled event.

I don't like the idea of Pride Parades. I don't like the idea of Mardi Gras. They have no meaning. They attract the kind of person that I don't mesh with very well. It's not latent homophobia or anything. I'm just what you might call a party-pooper. I prefer my socializing to occur on a less impersonal level, amongst fewer or less obvious posers. That is all. It's just a different idea of what's fun and what's not...not unlike the difference between desiring straight sex or *** sex. It's just who I am.

So yeah, I don't like Pride Parades. I'm sure that there are many *** men, like wxman, who can say the same. So what?

Live and let live.